She said her name was "party"
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
