So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
