we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
