I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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