That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
