ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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