He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
