Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
