i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
A+ Viking dick
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