The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
