who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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