So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
