I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
