so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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