Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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