It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I am naked and annoyed.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
