OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
