He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
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