when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
