whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
