so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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