My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i love accidental penises.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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