what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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