Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
