Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
