I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
