Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
She needs sedatives and a leash
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
