i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
