Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
This is classic penis vs brain.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
