just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
