Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize
