She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
BRING THE BAGELS
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
