who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
