About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
