My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
He? As in you personified your dick?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
