what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
