I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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