So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
