let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
we're making bets on your personal life
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
