my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
