I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
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