my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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