I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
