you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
