that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
