Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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