i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
