You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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