I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
