found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
We talked him into tasing himself.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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